I struggle to find words for the entitled person. They are one of the worst of humans.
If you give to them, they reward you with spite because they believe they deserve it anyway. Their appreciation is merely perfunctory.
“I’ve been a loyal friend to him all these years. Why won’t he do that for me”.
“I paid his house rent in 2001. He’s refunded but then, he ought to remain grateful”.
“He is my son, it is only expected. I suffered over him”.
If they offend you, you will first go through the sacrifices humiliation of explaining to them how they were wrong. If after a lengthy argument they finally admit their error and apologize, they want you to start smiling at them immediately and “let bygone be bygone”. If you still hurt and need time to heal, they are hurt because they simply cannot understand how you fail to know that they deserve forgiveness and don’t deserve to be kept waiting for something that is their right. Just imagine, and they have apologized for that matter! They can even accuse you right from that point of being unforgiving and preach to you from religion and psychology how failure to forgive is bad for you. Entitled people feel, “Why, he should forgive me of course, I’ve been nice most of the time”. Entitled people can’t tell God they are sorry. They come armed with the good deeds they have done and demand accounts so God should subtract the “little” bad from the massive goods and give them the balance.
Give the entitled man or woman a slice of your time and they sit pretty and demand the key to the termination minute.
“You always cut the phone on me. You could have been listening to me until you finish boarding and the announcement for people to switch off their phones”.
Return from a trip with something for them and they want to see what you bought for others and wonder why you didn’t give them a chance to make a choice.
Entitled people are control freaks and in some cases, the more manageable ones are those that make demands and are temperamental like children. The worst types don’t even shout or make demands outright. They creep in beneath your skin and manipulate you with charm, sex and niceness which they first habituate you to until you become addicted. From then, they begin to use the technique of a graduated, calculated withdrawal of those emotional goodies to manipulate and control you. The volent ones are easier in some ways. They are petulant children that are now mad husbands who growl on their wives for preparing the meals late and never say thank you to her after eating. They just feel she’s is doing her job like any other waiter or a janitor. But at least they are defined and you can start to make your calculations about their illness. There are wives too that take maximum advantage of husbands who have a nature that wants to please. They take control of their lives and enslave them and turn them into obedient slaves.
Entitled people will frustrate you slowly, sloooooowly, especially if they are very close to you. You will not know they are doing a damage to your inner life until you begin to notice that you breathe better and feel better when they are not around. You start to know that they are in some ways linked to a feeling of lack of freedom and you will start avoiding them. The relationship is now at the brink of an explosive collapse or a gentle necrosis and final browning off.
Hussaini Babila 